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Nowhere was this more apparent than in the early days of the Pick Up community, when people assumed that one of the secrets of success with meeting women is to “peacock”; that is, dress up in exotic or even outlandish ways in order to get attention.

They could be swapped out for the nearest stranger.

Nobody likes feeling like an interchangeable, anonymous cog, easily replaceable and ultimately unmemorable.

On a practical level, desperation hurts you in a multitude of ways.

You’re less likely to meet someone you would consider you will be turned off when they realize that any warm body will do and still more will assume that there must be a reason why you’ve been refused so often.

If you believe no woman could possibly find you attractive, you will elide over all evidence to the contrary – women flirting with you, giving you the “come-hither” stare or even just smiling at you – and focus like a laser on every incidence of negativity.